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| Why
Do I Feel Like This?

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There
are two types of disaster: natural disasters like the damage that results
from a hurricane, a tornado, floods, forest fires, volcanoes erupting and
earthquakes, and disasters that result from an intentional action of a
human. This second type includes the intentional acts of terrorism that
were just committed in our country. When the disaster is human caused, our
reactions are more severe and become much more complicated and difficult
to overcome.
This
disaster has probably caused you to question a number of things that you
previously believed about your own safety, the safety of your family and
friends, and moral issues of right and wrong behavior. This questioning is
a normal reaction to a disaster caused by another human being and it is
important that you give yourself time to sort out your feelings and
thoughts. Don't expect easy answers.
This
page will provide you with information about the emotional and physical
reactions you may be experiencing. It also contains some thoughts that we
hope will help you put in clearer perspective the impact this event has
had, and will have, on your life and on the lives of the people around
you. We hope this will help you put this event in its proper place in YOUR
life.
Why
was this event so disturbing and stressful?
Disaster
research tells us why some disasters are more stressful than others. The
reasons include:
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Lack
of warning. If we can prepare for something, even a
disaster, the event is less frightening than if we have no warning. |
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Abrupt
change of reality. A safe area suddenly becomes unsafe. |
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Type
of destructive agent used. The power of a bomb or gun or
whatever was used to harm others is frightening. In this disaster, the
use of a common means of safe transportation is very upsetting. |
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Fear
of additional destruction. We don't know what will happen
next so we are in a state of alert. |
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Outcome
of rescue attempts. Fears that no one or few people will be
found alive or that the rescue crews, themselves, can be hurt.
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Trauma
associated with seeing death so close at hand. Seeing the dead and
critically injured is especially disturbing. |
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Feelings
that there should have been some way to prevent such a disaster
from happening. |
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Media
coverage. When we view and review the damage repeatedly we
all become victims of the disaster. Anyone who watches the disaster
coverage can become what is called a "secondary victim" and
can suffer emotional and physical problems. However, don't be
surprised if others don't seem to be affected in the same way you are
by what they have seen and heard. Not everyone has immediate
reactions; some people have delayed reactions that show up days,
weeks, or even months later, and some people may never have a
reaction. |
What
kinds of emotions are "normal," and when will they go away?
There
is a natural anger, even rage, that goes along with the feeling that we
are unprotected from events like this, and that our way of life could be
changed so abruptly. There is also fear that the same thing could happen
to us and those we love. You may find that loud noises startle you more
easily, or that smells or objects associated with the event can create an
emotional reaction. Don't be surprised by these reactions.
Over
time, when nothing dangerous happens, they will disappear on their own.
You
may feel overwhelming sadness and depression, have problems thinking
things through, have trouble sleeping, or experience nightmares. These
feelings may go away and then return when something triggers thoughts of
the disaster.
As
a response to this stress, you may feel that you should do something to
"prove that you're alive" that you might you might not
ordinarily do. Please think carefully about the possible consequences of
your actions, and know that your feelings will pass. Or, you may want to
avoid your friends, miss school, and be alone or spend extra time with
your family. These are all common reactions of teenagers to disaster
events.
These
feelings and reactions should disappear within four to six weeks or less
as you resume your daily activities and focus your attention on other
things. Everyone feels stress in different ways, so don't compare yourself
with friends and family members, or judge their reactions or lack of
reactions.
Can
stress cause physical problems?
Stress
often causes physical problems. The most common include:
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Headaches |
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Stomachaches |
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Body
aches and pains |
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Flare-up
of allergies |
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Problems
falling asleep or staying asleep |
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Excessive
hunger or lack of appetite |
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Rashes |
As
your level of stress is reduced, you will find your physical problems will
disappear.
What
can I do?
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Talk
it out! Bottling up feelings and thoughts restricts your ability to
work through what happened and cope with the pain and insecurity. |
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Listen
to others. |
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Perform
random acts of kindness. Reassure yourself there is tenderness and
thoughtfulness in the world. Volunteer your services to someone in
need. |
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Spend
time with your family. |
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Return
to your usual routine. |
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Sit
under a tree, look at a brook, lake, river or ocean. |
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Remind
yourself of other times you have felt strong emotions and how they
resolved themselves. They will always be part of you and will guide
who you become and what you do, but they do not rule your life. |
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Ask
for help when you need it. Talk about your feelings with someone you
trust, such as your parents or another relative, a school counselor or
a spiritual leader. If your feelings continue to remain as strong or
last longer than four to six weeks, you may want to seek professional
help to help you sort through your feelings. |
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Do
something that could help others - for example, take a first aid or
CPR class. |
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